“Terms of Endearment” is Pure Evil

Warning: If you haven’t seen the movie, don’t read this post, come back to it after you’ve seen the movie. It just happens to be on Netflix so check it out. But in the meantime, I’ve got 64 other posts on this blog you can catch up on 😉

So after years of putting it off, I just watched one of the most soul-crippling-keeping-it-real-real-gut-wrenching-let’s-just-rip-your-heart-out-and-destroy-and-torment-every-emotional-bone-in-your-body movie that is Terms of Endearment.

6 things:

1. Wow, give me a moment. I don’t think I’ve ugly cried like this…EVER. Like if there was ever an award given for the most visually hideous ugly cry face in the history of the world, I’d win that thing, hands down. Worse than Claire Danes doing the ugly cry face and hers is BAD…like “I have to turn away from the TV” bad.

2. I now understand the hype that is Shirley Maclaine and Debra Winger. They are so brilliant and utterly effortless and perfect in their roles as mother and daughter.

3. I wish I had seen this before I became a wife and mother because no matter what anyone says, movies like this affect you on a whole different level and in a completely painful way because you can actually relate to the characters and their lives. The relationship between a mother and child is so…Delicate. I’m so grateful to have such an honest, free, hilarious, “We’ve been through some THIIIIIIIIIINGS but we came out of it stronger” and frustratingly rad relationship with my mom. She’s amazing…except when she’s telling me my house isn’t clean enough, I’m not feeding the kids enough, my clothes are all wrong and I need to wear makeup…on repeat.

4. I need chocolate and a beer. ASAP.

5. This chocolate and beer is good.

‪6. This movie isn’t only about the relationship between mothers and daughters…it’s also about family as a whole unit. One of my favorite scenes is the one where Emma is saying good-bye to her bickering boys. In one of the best acted and written scenes ever, Emma tells her son Tommy everything he needs to know about their relationship in such a simple and beautiful way so her son won’t be burdened with the pain that comes with realzing the things that were said and done as children. That there will be no reason for regrets or things left to be questioned.

Emma Horton: Ted, give me a kiss, come on. Tommy, you be sweet. Be sweet. And stop tryin’ to pretend like you hate me. I mean, it’s silly.

Tommy Horton: I like you.

Emma Horton: OK then, will you listen especially close?

Tommy Horton: What?

Emma Horton: Listen real hard?

Tommy Horton: I said ‘what’?

Emma Horton: I know you like me. I know it. For the last year or two, you’ve been pretending like you hate me. I love you very much. I love you as much as I love anybody, as much as I love myself. And in a few years when I haven’t been around to be on your tail about something or irritating you, you could… remember that time that I bought you the baseball glove when you thought we were too broke. You know? Or when I read you those stories? Or when I let you goof off instead of mowing the lawn? Lots of things like that. And you’re gonna realize that you love me. And maybe you’re gonna feel badly, because you never told me. But don’t – I know that you love me. So don’t ever do that to yourself, all right?

Holy crap, I need more chocolate…and Beer…and therapy. Probably all three.