My Tips on Potty Training

So another major mommy lesson learned from experience: POTTY TRAINING – Before I had kids I would always find it weird when I saw kids older than 2 years old wearing diapers and why? Because most kid books and society tells you that if your kid isn’t potty trained by a certain age, there is something wrong with your child because other kids do it by month 22 (I heard this COUNTLESS AMOUNT OF TIME from parents) or the parents are doing something wrong.

The truth? It’s all BS. A big load of cacapoopoo.

Kids will pee and poop in the toilet on their own time when they are ready no matter how much pressure you put on them or bribes you use. Patience is the biggest thing and I lost it a few times in the beginning because it is INCREDIBLY frustrating…but Josh has thankfully forgiven mommy for being craycray =)


Kathy: Potty training is not going as well as I’d hoped.
Mike: Don’t worry, he’ll get it.
Kathy: Yeah but everyone else’s kid seems to have no problems with it…
Mike: You mean according to what they write on Facebook? Pleaaase, they aren’t going to write any bad stuff about their kid…most people will only write good stuff even if it’s not true. Plus even if they are telling the truth, who cares, all kids develop differently.
Kathy: Just seems like all my friend’s kids totally got it within a few weeks and it’s been WEEEEEKS. Hope he’s not one of those kids in diapers until like age 6.
Mike: All kids develop differently, don’t underestimate Josh…He’ll get it. You’re already setting low expectations and that’s not fair.
Kathy: You’re absolutely right.
(looking at Josh) I’m sorry.
Josh: I want cake.


So here’s my advice on all things potty training:

1. Try and remain calm cause there will be days when you will come thisclose to losing it but it doesn’t do any good, it just freaks the kid out and you feel like a giant butthole afterwards.

2. When they do potty, no matter how small or big, make a big deal out of it. The little monsters love it and they feel extremely proud and that’s always a great thing. Have some treats ready to reward them. Also, besides some pull-ups for the night time and to wear when you they go out, get some super cute underwear for the kiddos to wear at home. My boys loved the superhero ones and wore regular boys underwear at home. Eventually, they hated the wetness and started going potty in the toilet. Hooray!

3. Just because someone’s kid reads, is potty trained, talks, walks, blah blah blah does everything faster than your kid doesn’t mean they are better or smarter than your kid…just simply means they did it faster. Big freakin whoop. There’s no “my kid did it first, so suck it!” trophys given, only imaginary ones by ridiculous parents who are unnecessarily competitive.


2/1/14 – Bathtime cause someone missed the toilet…by a foot. *shrug* Sh*t happens.

4. If the potty training kid has a baby sibling, keep an eye on the little one cause he will think it’s playtime and start splashing around in the pee on the ground and/ or try to grab his big brother’s weiner every time he tries to potty.

5. If daddy pees outside, more likely than not, the son will be do the same. So be very careful in what you do in front of your kid. Your 3 year old might, for example, pull his pants down to his ankles, pull out his peepee and take a tinkle…in front of a whole lotta kids…at a Birthday party. Just sayin.

Kathy: Matty, you can’t go peepee outside.
Matty: That was when I was little.
Kathy: Dude, you went peepee outside at Susie mommy’s house a few days ago.
Matty: I’m older now. Plus it totally okay, no one see me go peepee.
Kathy: People saw you, they told me.
Matty: Nooo, they crazy because I use the invisible powers and I help her plant grow better.

6. There is nothing wrong with teaching boys to go potty sitting down. Less mess 😉

7. Potty training gets messy! Have your mop and paper towels ready because there’s a good chance there will be a lot pee and poop on the floor, clothes, bed, walls etc…It happens and it’s completely normal. For all the germaphobe moms and dads, remain calm…or try, super duper hard to keep your cool.

This too shall pass.


He said he needed ALLLLLL THIS TOILET PAPER for one little poop. Buy A LOT of toilet paper.

Love you long time,


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